Sunday, June 7, 2009

I'm stuck

So WW isn't going all that great. In fact, I haven't been even going to the meetings at work. Ever since I decided to quit smoking, it seems like all I do is eat. the problem with that is that I'm eating all the wrong things. So I've decided to take a little time off from WW. I'll rejoin at the next session in late July. I'm not quitting but I'm just not into it right now.
Now the smoking thing hasn't exactly been going all that great either. I do fine during the day at work. I don't even think about it. But once I get home, it's all I can think of. So now I guess I'm a closet smoker. Geez I'm pathetic! I'm still trying to make it a clean break but so far all it's gotten me is gaining 8 lbs. I'm not happy about not having any self control.
I don't deal well with stress. And it seems like every time I turn around, there is something else to stress about. If it's not my weight, it's quitting smoking. If it's not that, it's finances. Or family issues. Or whatever. It's always something.
Like right now, I have poison ivy. My yard is infested with it. There is no avoiding it. I think I should buy stock in Round Up. I've sprayed different parts of the yard about 5 times now and will most likely spray 5 more times. I've tried every remedy known to mankind and I wake up with a new spot of the rash every day. It's tradition I think. It seems like every summer, just before I am leaving for my summer trip to Michigan, I get poison ivy. So I spend $$$ on all types of anti-itch cream and pray that it goes away.
Another stress I have coming up. My biological father and his wife are coming in for a family reunion. I haven't seem him in many years although, at my mother's insistence, I have been in contact with him via email. In two years, my father and his wife have gone on, at least, 4 cruises to carious parts of the globe. I kind of resent that because all the years I was growing up, he never paid child support for us 4 kids while my mother worked 2-3 jobs. He has lived the 'good life'. I have struggled. There's so much more to this whole scenario but it still boils down to the fact that he is coming back here for the reunion and will be treated like royalty amongst the family. Blech!! His wife has told me that they would like to take us kids out to breakfast or dinner on Father's Day. Yippy skippy.
I have other family issues that I'm still trying to come to terms with as well.

I think I need some tequila.

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